Peril of thoughts

I,
speak
and then
quietened

I,
smiled
and then
cried

Smiles,
amidst the sorrows
cries
in the pain

Grief,
in the perils
thoughts
with perks

I,
jot words
thrash them
on the wall

I,
the prescient
me
the narrator

Metta !!
Image courtesy: Deviant Art

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हस्ना ना रोना

आज रोत़े रोते आख पथरा सी गई शायद
रोना जो भूल गए थे हम
हस्ने कि बारी जब आए
बुला लेना हमको भी प्यारे
वारे-न्यारे हो जाएंगे हम
:-)!

अस्तु !

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सोच- दोस्रो कडी !

कति निरिह छ प्राणि आफ्नो सोचको आवेग थाम्न नसकि आफ्नैहरुको बीच पराया जस्तो हुन पुग्दछ।  कसरि सम्झाउनु त्यो सोचलाई जहिले टाठो भएर बसेस्, जहिले विचारवान भएस् । कसरि भन्नु ति उडी हिड्ने सोचहरुलाई - तैले कहिल्यै कुनै फरक तरिकाले सोच्न पाउदैनस् , केहि गर्न त झनै पाउदैनस् । सदैव एकै तरिकाले  बसेस् । दुखे पछि ऐया नि नभनेस् । खुशी भएपछि जे गर्न मन लाग्छ गरेस्। बस् आफ्नो काबुमा बसेस्। यसैलाई आफ्नो जीवन मन्त्र बनाइ हिडेस्।  

अस्तु !

पहिलो: सोच- एक कडी

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She-my friend (the long distance talks) !

"Oie, k chha khabar," Suman messaged her from the other end. Though miles away they were always together and a word from Suman was her solace.

"Good," was her brief reply.

"How's life going on? Been long we have chatted, I was busy I must admit. So tell me how are things running at your end,"Suman asked it all in a sentence.   

" :-)," was her reply.

":-)," Suman smiled back. "Come, lets Skype," she added.

After a brief silence she started,"I was just searching for words Suman, where do I start from. It sometime just feels sadder knowing the fact that some things are not for you and may be then again you are longing for it. Though you know it was never for you but still the craving was there. The craving was even not for anything more, just that things do not dissemble or may be I do not know what." Preeya said in a flawed tone.

Preeya seemed depressed. Suman exactly knew the feelings that was flowing inside her. That was she, who could exactly depict the thought flows of Preeya, exactly knew what she was going through, exactly could relate things. She could sonder and ponder at the same time.

"Keep saying," was her say.

Preeya quietened for sometime, neither did she speak nor messaged. After sometime the message box blinked up. "Suman, may be I can't depict my says properly. May be I am a bad communicator, people do not understand me or moreover I do not let people understand me and then the dispute rises up."

Suman was smiling at the other end and typed,"and then??"

"And then I ruin up every thing--every piece of thing exactly," she spoke. "I act damn weird at times. May be I am very possessive at times and that exactly shows in my actions. I do not actually mean it but that happens time and then and result is my complains of self at your place. I don't want things as such Suman. I am literally tired," Preeya said sadly. "Everyday I try doing things well from my end and then I end up ruining things. I am off taking things as such. I want peace."

Suman knew what she was feeling and going through. She did not want to speak anything more today cause she knew even words were not going to heal her for the day. The pain was more severe which Preeya was going for the day. She just sent her a photo showing two trees and typed on the screen,"be we be farther as shown in the pic yet we will always be as near as they could be captured in a picture. Don't you worry Preeya, I am always there for you."

Far-yet near !

Tears flew down Preeya's eyes and they were tears of joy after the cloud of painful thoughts flew out of her. She gave a faint smile and send back a smiley," :-) I love you Suman," was what she could reiterate.

Metta !

Image: Kanchan

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Of Books and Reads !

There are phases in life when you happen to like some books a lot and then years later when you look back and turn over the same pages you don't find them as interesting as it used to be. As worthy as it was back then, but still, you have some feelings for the book-for the read you made. In this write I felt like talking about my love for books; when and how it started and where is it going these days.

My book love started back in the school days where reading stories from text books used to be fun. After finishing my own class reads, I used to finish up all the stories from my elder sister's English and Nepali text books. In addition to these there was a English supplemetary book for our school reads which used to be a short story book. All these instances geared up my love for the books.

Daniel Defoe was the first writer I read back in class 1 with "Robinson Crusoe" crowned up as the first novel. I have faint memories of Johann David Wyss with "The Swiss Family Robinson" in Class 2. I read more of Mark Twain in the latter classes with "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" and "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn". And then it was Sir William Shakespeare with "The tales from Shakespeare" which was a compilation of the tales by Shakespeare compiled by Charles Lamb and Mary Lamb. I read the "Geeta" and "Mahabharat" back then in my high school days.

At the same time back at home we used to read "comics" which kept on increasing the fascination for another genre of book. Chacha Chaudhary, Bhokal, Super Commando Dhruva, Naagraj, Pinky, Channi Chachi, Raman, Bankelal, Doga, Fantom, Mandrake used to add up the attraction always. Along with them there were monthly story books Nandan, Nanhe Samrat, Champak and others which were the added attractions. There always used to be chunk of books in both Nepali and Hindi back at home which always fascinated me. 

While I started reading the second genre of novels it started with Arundhati Roy's "The god of small things", Ayn Rand's "The fountainhead", Leo Tolstoy's "Anna Karenina". I read couple of Sidney Sheldon as well. Books kept on adding up and so on added were the reads.

In the later days, I liked Paulo Coelho after reading "The Alchemist". The Alchemist is one of its kind. It has impressed me in many ways. I was so impressed by the author the then that I immediately bought and read "By the river Piedra I sat and wept"-I liked the read. But then there was "Brida" and "Eleven minutes" which I started and never finished. Albeit there are many other reads which I have never been able to complete after starting but regarding these two reads they didn't fascinate me anytime, so I just stopped reading them. Lately I had a discussion with a friend of mine who was telling Paulo Coelho is such a lousy writer who writes of things and talks of fantasies and a dream world which never exists. I could not convince him with the idea that some books are just like first love, you love them a time and just like them with not much of attraction or things now but still like them.

Similar was the case for Robin Sharma. Sharma is famous for his motivational writes and speeches. The first read I made from him was "Who will cry when you die". I really liked the book then, which was a train souvenir while we were coming back from India to Nepal. Immediately after finishing the first read by Mr. Sharma I bought "The Monk who sold his Ferrari", I liked the read then too. This year I happened to buy one more motivational read by him which I could never turn even a page more. And these days, when I try reading the first two reads I made, I cannot read them anymore. Those books have some good memories with me and now they are like nonexistent being for me.

I like Murakami, Khaled Hosseini, Khalil Gibran and Kafka too. After reading "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hosseini I tormented for a long time, it was that touching. I have grown up reading my grandpa Aatma Ram Ojha. I like books by Saru Bhakta, Jagadish Ghimire, B.P.Koirala, Parijaat. I keep on reading one or the other writer time and then. A single read by some while a chunk by others. I have been reading more of Richard Bach and John Green lately. I am impressed by both of these writers. Reads keep on adding on the list and my hunger for reading them keeps on increasing too.

As Ernest Hemingway says,“There is no friend as loyal as a book.”  I can't help adding my friends :-)

Happy reading folks!

Metta !!

Picture courtesy: Deviant Art

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When "existences" are "mistakes" !

Early morning I happened to check all the social media chaos. Twitter and Instagram are my favorite for the cause. Starting the day with some nice pictures at Instagram makes you feel awesome. Among many in the pictures' world there's a page @humansofny which takes you to the real world scenario. Some pics make you smile, some makes you sad, some ecstatic while some encouraging. Each brings different emotions as each talks of a real life story. And today when I was looking at the following picture, it left me back with so many unanswered questions. Some questions are so obscure that we are left back wondering; haunting for the answers.

This is her story where she speaks:

She says “I met my dad for the first time when I was fifteen. I visited him in Trinidad for two months during the summer. He met me at the airport and acted like he missed me more than anything else in the world. He ran up to me and lifted me in the air and started kissing me and saying how much he missed me. He carried all my luggage, and gave me money, and stopped by the supermarket on the way home to buy me all this food. He was introducing me to his friends like he was so proud of me. He’d say: ‘Look at my beautiful daughter,’ and things like that. It actually got me imagining how nice it would be to have a dad. Then at the end of the day, he dropped me off at my grandmother’s house, and I only saw him two or three times for the rest of the summer. The last night I was with him, he got really drunk, and he told me that I’d been a mistake. He was laughing when he said it, like it was a joke, and I should think it was funny. I pretended like it didn’t bother me, but it did. I thought: ‘So is that why you never wanted to visit or talk to me all these years?’’

This was such a heart wrenching truth, may be one or the other of us is always a "mistake"? Just the result of some intimate moments of thy parents/a couple. When our existence questions ourselves as a "mistake", how obscure the living becomes. May be I am a "mistake"? May be you are a "mistake"? May be we commit a "mistake"? and all these "mistakes" is our true self?

I am left back with some unanswered questions. Probably this is the sondering moment.

Metta !

And then @beeshalll came up with some amazing answers in the write "Existence are not mistakes, until we believe they are!"

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She- my friend !

"At first you always look for that cozy place where you can rest your head upon and shed down some of your tears," Preeya sounded depressed with the first line of her words.

"Knowing that the wall won't respond, would never feel a bit I can't help banging my head on it.  And see you can see a big cramp on my head," she signaled jokingly. 

I smiled, yet knew that Preeya was not happy and something was grieving her bad. I thought she would speak some more but she quietened. Silence creeped in between us as the night had enveloped the day. It was all dark.

"What happened Preeya," I tried to break the silence.

"Nothing Suman," she gulped the fresh tears that were lingering in her eyes.

I could not bear the silence and the sadness in her eyes and spoke off deliberately, "listen to this song Preeya." The song started playing in my playlist.

With each line of the song I saw her smiling and she was humming the lines along with the track as it began;

I can almost see it.

That dream I'm dreaming, but

There's a voice inside my head saying

You'll never reach it

Every step I'm takin'

Every move I make

Feels lost with no direction,

My faith is shakin'
But I, I gotta keep tryin'
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down, but
No I'm not breaking
I may not know it, but
These are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep goin',
And I, I gotta be strong
Just keep pushing on, 'cause

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb----2

Yeah

Keep on movin'
Keep climbin'
Keep the faith baby
It's all about, it's all about the climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, whoa, whoa, oh.

~~~~!!

Both of us could not help our smiles. Moon was shining bright in the sky and we were full-on in the musical moods... :-)

Metta !

Video Courtesy: You tube

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Existence-II

"And I couldn't have been more sad," whispered the wind.

"What happened," asked the flowing breeze.

"You take away my existence," replied the wind in despair.

The breeze quietened and flew away slowly slowly.

Breeze or the wind--that makes a difference in my existence

Metta !
Image courtesy: bishal
Pre-existent: Existence 

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डडेल्धुरा नियात्रा !

कार्तिक २१, २०७१
डडेल्धुरा नियात्रा

लेख्न शुरु गर्दा मेरो एक जना साथीले भनेको सम्झिए, "घुम्न र फोटो खिच्न कस्लाई पो मन पर्दैन होला र?" र त्यो मन पराइबाट म आफुलाई नि कहिल्यै पनि टाढा राख्न सक्दिन :-) हुन त म सुदुर पश्चिममा नै हुर्के बढेको हुँ तर यहाँको डाडा काडा चाहार्ने मौका भने मलाई कहिल्यै नि मिलेको थिएन। यसपाली जब चिया पिउदै मेरी एक जना साथीले डडेल्धुराको उग्रतारा मन्दिरमा बर्षेनी लाग्ने जात(मेला)मा समिल्लित हुन जाने कि भनि प्रस्ताव राखिन्, मन तेसै फुरुङ्ग भयो। जानु पर्छ होला भन्ने चिया गफ भयो र कुरो तेतिकै टुंगियो।  म आफु चाही एक पटक नि आफ्नो क्षेत्र को डाडा काडा न गएको र एउटा नया क्षेत्र घुम्न पाउने मोह त्याग्न न सकि अर्को दिन जानपर्छ भन्ने योजनालाई तुरुन्तै कार्यन्वयन गर्नतिर लागेम। र यसरि शुरु भयो  भयो कार्तिक पुर्णिमाको दिन बिहानै हाम्रो "उग्रतारा जात (मेला)" दर्शन को मेलो। हामि ६ जना अफिसका 'कलिग' बिहानै पख उठी लाग्यौ पश्चिम पहाड तिर। धनगढीबाट शुरु भएको हाम्रो यात्रा निकै घुमाउरो बाटो हुदै डडेल्धुरा तर्फ लाग्यो। तेही बाटा र हाम्रो घुमाइको केहि प्रसङ्ग मैले फोटो हरु मार्फत राख्ने जमर्को गरेकी छु।  

डडेल्धुराको बाटोको सुरुवात यहाँ बाट भएको।    

मनमोहक हिम-शृंखला 

मनमोहक हिम-शृंखला-२ 

उग्रतारा मन्दिर जाने बाटो 

उग्रतारा प्रागंड 

उग्रतारा मन्दिर 

मेला को मेलो 

मनमोहक फिरफिरे :-)!

:-)

सैनिक गडि 

सुरुङ्ग भित्र जाने बाटो 

बाटाहरु :-)!

ढल्किएको दिन :-)

र यसरि विभिन्न याद बोकी सकियो डडेल्धुराको नियात्रा।  

इति !!

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Thoughts never rest !

My thoughts never rest.
Some day I wish
they let themselves rest

My thoughts never rest.
I let them fly
let them live their life

And My thoughts never rest.
.........
.....................................

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Thoughts !

My thoughts never rest.
They have a mind of their own which wove a hundred and ten more type of thoughts.

Metta !
Image courtesy: Deviant Art

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महर्षि वेदव्यासको कर्म भूमि

आत्माराम ओझा 

नेपाल र भारत राजनीतिकरूपले अलग अलग राष्ट्र भए पनि सांस्कृतिकरूपले भने दुवै देशमा एकता छ। यसका लागि दुवै देशका धर्म प्राण हिन्दु जनताको छिमेकी देशको तीर्थाटनको निरन्तरता सृष्टि कालदेखि अहिलेसम्म यथावत् रहिआएको छ।

तैपनि महात्मा गौतम बुद्धको जन्मभूमि सम्बन्धमा होस् अथवा प्रथम सगरमाथा (एभरेस्ट) आरोहीको मामिलामा होस् भारतका केही पत्रपत्रिका नेपाली क्षेत्रका विशेषतालाई आफ्नो क्षेत्रमा रहेको लेख्न संकोच गर्दैनन्।

यसै सिलसिलामा चार वेदका सम्पादनकर्ता एवं अठार पुराण तथा महाभारत ग्रन्थसमेतका निर्माता भगवान द्वैपायन वेदव्यासलाइ पनि भारतीय क्षेत्रकै उत्पत्ति भनेर भारतीय समाचारहरुमा आउने गरेका छन्। नेपालको एउटा टिभी प्रसारणमा श्री वेदव्यासको जन्मभूमि नेपालको तनहुँ दमौलीमा भएको र उनका पिता महर्षि परासर र वेदव्यासको गुफा अहिलेसम्म विद्यमान रहेको तथा वेदव्यासको १०८ फुट अग्लो मूर्ति निर्माण गरिने भएको खबर प्रशारण भएको थियो। उक्त प्रशारणमा वेदव्यासले १८ पुराण पनि दमौलीमा नै बसी लेखेका थिए भन्नेसमेत उल्लेख थियो।

आफ्नो देशका महान् विभूतिहरुको परिचय देश विदेशमा दिइरहनु प्रशंसनीय कुरा हो तर अधुरा समाचारहरुले भ्रममात्र सिर्जना गर्छ। वेदव्यासको जन्म तनहुँ दमौलीमा भएको हुन सक्छ तर उहाँबाट रचित पुरानादी ग्रन्थहरु दमौलीमा बसेर लेखेका भन्ने कुनै प्रमाण प्रस्तुत भएन। महाभारत ग्रन्थमा वेदव्यासले हिमालय कैलाशतर्फ गमन गरेको यस श्लोकले पनि पुष्टि गर्छ :

स्वस्तिस्तेस्तु गमिस्यामी कैलाश पर्वत प्रति।

अप्रयस स्थिरोदान्त प्रिथिव्याम परिपालय।।

(महाभारत सभा पर्व (कल्याण अवतार अंकबाट)

महाभारत युद्धपूर्व कौरवहरुले पाण्डवहरुलाई राज्य अंश नदिने हठ गरेका कारण उत्पन्न अवश्यम्भावी युद्धमा क्षत्रीयहरुको महाविनाश हुन सक्ने भविष्य आंकलन गरी आमा सत्यवतीसहित व्यासले कैलाश पर्वततर्फ गमन गर्नुभएको स्पष्ट छ। कैलाश गमनको सिलसिलामा उहाँ दार्चुला जिल्लाअन्तर्गतका ठाउँहरुमा बस्नुभएको प्रमाण विद्यमान छन्।

दार्चुला जिल्लामा व्यास गुफा नामक एउटा विशाल गुफा (कन्दरा) छ जसमा बसेर वेदव्यासले भनेअनुसार गणेशजीले पुराणादि लेख्नुभएको थियो भन्ने कथा पनि छन्। प्राचीनकालमा भोजपत्रहरुमा लेख्ने गर्थे। यसैअनुरूप दार्चुलाकै विशाल भोजपत्रको जंगलबाट ठूलाठूला ताउ भोजपत्रहरु निक्लने हुनाले त्यसबाट निकालिएका भोजपत्रका ताउहरुमा गणेशजीले लेख्नुभएको थियो हककला। स्मरणीय छ, दार्चुला कैलाश पर्वत निकटको जिल्ला हो। शिव–पार्वतीको निवास मानिएको कैलाशबाट वेदव्यासले गणेशलाई बोलाएर ल्याई ब्यास गुफामा बसी पुराण महाभारतादी ग्रन्थ लेखाएको हुन सक्छ। भगवान शिव मल्लिकार्जुनरूपले दार्चुला जिल्लाकै एउटा शिखरमा विराजमान हुनुहुन्छ र लटबाब, गलबाब नाउले गणेशजी तथा कुमार कार्तिकेयका मन्दिर पनि विद्यमान छन्।

वेदव्यासको दार्चुला जिल्लामा निवास भएको कारण त्यहाँका आदिवासी सौका समुदाय आफूलाई भगवान वेदव्यासका सन्तति अथवा शिष्यका रूपमा मान्छन् र यीमध्ये एउटा समूहलाई व्यासी पनि भन्छन्। यस क्षेत्रमा व्यासका नाउँबाट अनेक स्मृति विद्यमान छन् जसमा व्यास हिमाल, व्यास गर्खा, व्यास गुफा, व्यास मन्दिर पर्छन् । व्यास मन्दिरमा वर्षेनी मेला लाग्छ र सौका समुदायबाट पूजाअर्चना हुने गर्छ।

यसप्रकार वेदव्यासको जन्म भूमि र कर्म भूमि नेपाली क्षेत्रमै रहेको बुझिन्छ। महाभारत ग्रन्थका कथाहरुमा पनि माता सत्यवतीले बोलाएका बेला हस्तिनापुर जाने/आउने गरेका प्रसङ्ग छन् तर उहाँको स्थायी बसोबास भने हस्तिनापुर होइन। तनहुँ दमौलीमा वेदव्यासको महिमा दर्शाउने स्मृति चिह्नस्वरूप उहाँको ठूलो मूर्ति स्थापित गर्ने जस्ता कुरा अत्यन्त सराहनीय छन्। तर महाभारतको महायुद्धपछि दार्चुला जिल्लामा निवास भएको कुरा वर्णन नभएमा उहाँको इतिहास अपूर्ण रहन सक्ने हुँदा यो प्रसङ्ग कसैले पनि छोड्नु हुँदैन।

श्रीकृष्ण द्वैपायन वेदव्यासको र श्यामा (महाकाली) नदी विषयमा स्कन्द पुराणको मानस खण्डमा पनि यस प्रकार लेखिएको देखिन्छ :

k"hOTjf u'+? Jof;Zofdf d"n]nof]lDjtd\ .

cfrf/ xLgf blkhgf tq:yfg\k;Gtd ..

t]h]of Jof; ;b[iod\ exfly k"Hof g ;+;o .

of] j|h]g g[k;fO{ k'0o+ Jof;f>df k/d\ ..

cy{M Zofdf (dxfsfnL_ gbLsf] d"ndf tk:of ug]{ u'?Jof;sf] k"hf ugf{n] cfr/0fxLg JolQmx? Klg kljq x'G5g\ .

lxdfno t6] PDdf] k'0of Jof;f>df] xjf .

Zofdfof ;+ud k'0of ljz]if]0ft' j0f{t] ..

Zofdfof ;+ud] :gfTjf g/f]xl/ k/d\ j|h]t ..

;/k" ;+oq] k'0of Zofdf gfd ;dfugf ..

cy{M lxdfnosf] /d0fLo t6df l:yt k'Ho Jof; cf>d af6 pTkGg Zofdf (dxfsfnL_ gbLsf] ljz]if j0f{g ul/Psf] 5 . Zofdfdf :gfg ug]{ JolQm >L xl/ kb k|fKt ub{5 . 

स्मरणीय छ, कैलाश मानसरोवर तीर्थयात्राका लागि नेपाली क्षेत्रको प्रमुख मार्ग पनि दार्चुला नै हो।  

साभार : नागरिक दैनिक बाट 

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My GURU !

There are so many instances in life when you are remembered Dr. Yonzon. You are the GURU who holds and will forever hold the sacred place in our hearts. Humans are emotional and we possess this human behavior of un-forgetfulness too. Coz at the end what remains is the memory and we lived some awesome moments with you making up the best of memories for life. 

I still feel ecstatic and proud for the moments spent with you, around you and I proudly post this memoir over here too. We love you Pralad sir.

Deep respects !

Pic taken at Resources Himalaya Foundation

And still I get *wordless* to write some more.
Stay in peace
Metta !

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क्षण-२ !!

"कस्तो हुदो हो जब तिमीले आफुले नगरेको गल्तिको सजाय भोग्नु पर्ने हुन्छ । तिमिले केहि गरेको नि हुदैनौ, न केहि भन्नलाइ नै हुन्छ तिमि सङ कहिले पनि। तर जहिले कुसुरवार सरि तिमीलाई नै ठड्याइञ्छ," उनीले भनिन् आफु सँग नै।

आफु सँग बोल्ने  बानि नै भैसकेको  थियो उन्को अचेल।  तेही लवजमा अरुले जो बुझ्दैन थिए उन्ले भनेको कुरोहरु। अनि उनि नि कसैलाई बुझाउन नसक्ने भई कि थिइन अचेल । उनिलाई जहिले नया नया कुरो गरी रहन पर्ने । कति तेही कुरो भनि रहनु जस्तो लाग्न थालेको थियो उनिलाई । एकै ठाउमा बसी रहनु, एकै कुरो गरी रहनुले विकासक्रम बाधिएको जस्तो लाग्थ्यो उनिलाई।  

जहिले चरी सरि उड्न, नयाँ आकाश चाहार्न चाहन्थिन उनि । उडान कसैले रोकी देला? पन्ख कसैले काटी देला ?भन्ने डर चाही जहिले रहन्थ्यो फेरी उनिलाई । आफ्नो वरि-परिको परिवेश बारे के नै भन्न सकिन्थ्यो र उसै पनि?

कुन दिन कुनै बाजले फड्को हानि आउछ र अनन्त आकाशलाई नै सानो बनाइ दिन्छ भन्ने बडो डर छ उनिलाई ।  तेही डरले होला शायद, उनको आखा बडो बोल्न थालेको छ अचेल।  केहि डर नभनिए नि आखामा जो देखिन्छन। तर ति सादा डराएका आखा कुनै रुपमा नि राम्रो देखिदैन भनेर बुझाउन सक्ने क्षमता उनि आफु संग नि  रहेको छैन अचेल। सोच्दा-सोच्दै आखा पत्थर सरि सुन्न प्राय हुन जान्छन अनि थकित भएर सुत्छिन उनि।

इति !

पहिलो: क्षण !!
चित्र: डेविअण्ट आर्ट बाट !

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Stone !

"Stones are worshiped as idols", it said.

"Sad to know you are a "stone". You will just be worshiped now," I smiled.


Metta !!

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Reflection !

You bid farewell
See the reflection
Get reflected !!

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Tits-bits-of life--They continued the story !

Preeya knew I was up for trekking again and she would not be in touch with me for long. May be that was the reason, I witnessed 30 missed calls from her in my phone again. So she was trying hard to talk to me a thought flew over my mind.

I called her back and as soon as she picked up the phone she could not stop herself and started without any formality,"at every point I feel like writing. Writing always gives me solace. There are always as many ideas as could be flying by in my mind that need to rest. I have this weird feeling of being heard always...I always have so many says to say to peoples and I am always filled with ideas. Ahh ! Suman what do I do?"

"Hmm," I said (this was our usual way of listening).

"Sometimes I feel, would I just end up in this wall of writes or sayings? Or will my ideas, my thoughts land up as somewhere concrete?" she quivered. 

I was listening to her quietly while she was speaking in her usual tone.

"Having a bunch of ideas is always a tough thing and I always have been going through this. Life's tough Suman," she added with a long sigh.

I could not help smiling. And she knew that I could exactly depict her feels.

"You know what Preeya every single individual thrives for their individuality, stands to be something different from the other," I started slowly.

"Do you know the word 'sonder'?," I inquired.

"No, what is it?," was her prompt response.

"It is a sudden realization that everyone we see/meet has as complicated and interesting life as ours. So, how much do we really think about other people? Do we have time to do that? Similarly, what makes us think that others have time to think about us and if they really do, how boring and dull their life really is," I replied in a casual tone.

"Hmm....That's interesting," was what she could say.

I was on with the flow,"Also, I have realized that time actually travels so much faster when you live in a different society. Trying to work, finding a place to live/rent, communicating with different people everyday makes our lives so filled with tiny details that we have maneuver our ways through that we think everyday routines are petty."

"But on the other hand, people who have lived in the same place for decades, donot have to interact with different personalities on a daily basis hold on to the same old thoughts. So, usually people who have lived a very stagnant life tend to be more judgmental than the ones on the move."

"So, if you are looking for friendship that you think is neutral and supportive, find people who are always on the move, and who enjoy that kind of adventure. Just saying that if you seek some kind of openness and a good healthy relationship/friendship, careful that you dont seek it from people who have nothing else to do all day rather than edit and post their selfies on facebook. If you find more "interesting" friends, your obsession over one person that you think is so wise and cool will subside because you will know so many people that are wise, smart, generous and cool."

"I am up making friends Suman," Preeya said.

"I dont think you are up making friends- just saying that if you dont have a few friends that you can actually "talk to" and think wont judge you, then maybe you are not making "good friends", or in the right context. No one ever meets people who can fulfill all your needs- emotional, physical, mental, sexual... but lets say someone can meet your emotional needs, but not your mental- they can at least be supportive of your needs."

We were scratching thoughts as much as possible. We both were struggling with the ideas and I just tried to let her flee her thoughts with my says. I felt she could subside some of her thoughts, but still it was a long run. Life as it is.

I called upon her, but may be she had already slept. I could hear her snoring. The burgeoning thoughts might have made her tired, I smiled and let the phone cut off. 

We always have tonnes of thoughts-one residing over the other

Metta !

Image courtesy: @deviantart

Series: Tits-bits-of life-A story

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Tale of the two worlds-II

As soon as she woke up that morning the first thing that came in her mind was him. He, who was her best of friends-yet he, whom she had not heard from ages. She had to go for her routinized morning run but she couldn't help talking out to him before getting on to the daily chores.

She logged into her PC and saw him online. She expected him to call her so waited for sometime. But after his silence for a longer time, she knocked him against the screen which always kept them apart yet always kept them in touch. 

The talk started with casual hi's and hello's and they reached talking about tennis where Federer had recently won a match. Federer was their favorite. After talking for sometime the unusual silence came in between them again. She started feeling uncomfortable and thought of some topics to speak to. 

"What if I write about our story?" she said in a soft sparkling voice

"There's no story of ours for heaven's sake," his voice was suddenly agitated.

"My feels carry the story, be you not bother about it. I will write our story," her voice swayed away. 

There was no response from him. Recently this was the best way he did answer me with, unlike other days where he used to speak so much. He did not speak a word more. Silence creeped in as the fog of the cold winter morning which was awaiting for her outside.

"I move off. Good day," she typed on the screen and walked away. Walked away into the early morning hues to get better and feel better for the rest of her coming life.

Metta !!
So here I start a new series of the story "Tale of the two worlds" after my first take in "Tale of the two worlds"
Image courtesy: Popoks @deviantart

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Expectations !

Sometimes I,

don't have words

And then I

end wordless

And if I,

end wordless
Won't you be,
my world of words

Sometimes I,
crave for things
And then I,
look for you
And if I,
look for you
Won't you then,
come around again

Sometimes I,
miss you loads
And then I,
wish for you
And if I,
wished for you
Won't you then,
be there for me

Sometimes I,
keep on wishing
And then I,
wish you hear
And if I,
wish for you
Won't you then,
listen to me

Sometimes I,
scratch endless words
And then I,
expect some piece of your words
And if I,
expect a piece from you
Won't you then,
do a favor to me

Sometimes I,
mumble a lot
And then I,
wish you hear my mumblings'
And If I,
wish you to hear
Won't you then,
hear and respond

Sometimes I,
keep on waiting
And then I,
wish my waitings end
And if I,
wish my waitings to end
Won't you then,
listen this much at all

Metta !!
Image courtesy: Popoks @deviantart

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