It's pretty weird, very very weird in fact when she tells me "you should be sad for the unknown saddening that might approach your life"
"Why are you so happy?" "Anything can happen anytime. Nothing is sure."
The message comes to me as "Cry over what has not come to you, but you never know can come. Not every person has a good life like you and you should be *pretty sad* because you have a good life which can alter any time. Don't be happy," that is her message many times. And I wonder why is this that this world and its people are left with the fondness for sadism. I try to make her understand to be happy, yet I am left back being tagged as the stubborn one because I advocate for positivism and say "why do you always start with a NO".
It's pretty draining Suman. It is very draining.
I fight with the world Suman, but not always.....this drains me to infinity.
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Or maybe this is what her life has been all throughout and she cannot think beyond it, even if she tries, even if she tried. And then ends up bringing the river of tears in her eyes because this was what happened to her whole her life. Whenever she assumed things would set back on track, suddenly some unwanted happening popped up leaving her with tears. Having lived 50 years of life as such, maybe she has left her hopes, her happiness somewhere in between and maybe I try to bring back some hope for her.
In her haplessness, she tried being bold seeing how she has seen the world as always. Maybe someday this change. Maybe someday.
I wait for the day!
Metta!!
